healthy body tips

I’ve never been afraid to ask for what I want in bed. I guess because during my teenage years I figured out I was/am a perv and I just owned it. But in my decade-plus of hooking up with dudes, I’ve come to see being clear about what I want is a bit rare: Guys have told me other women become self-conscious when asking for something risqué or kinky.

So, I’m going to help you out, boys. Here are some things your lady might want, but she’s too self-conscious to ask for. Don’t pressure anything, of course — but if you offer, you may be pleasantly surprised at how enthusiastically she accept

1. She wants you to eat her out more: Our culture has a weird relationship with vag, if you haven’t noticed. Your lady has likely been exposed to a lot of lame-o messages telling her that her vag is “too hairy,” “too smelly,” “tastes gross,” “ugly,” etc. She might really love getting oral sex, but she’s afraid to ask you to do it because she’s afraid you’ve internalized the same messages that she has.

How to ask: It’s time to start sincerely praising her lady parts big time: “Your p**sy is so pretty!” “I love the way your vagina looks.” “I love the way your p**sy tastes.” “I love hearing you moan while I eat you out!” And so on. (If she is offended by the word “p**sy,” obviously you should say something different.) If she is still skittish about being eaten out, don’t push it. Offer to give a massage all over her inner thighs and on the outer folds of her labia; keep offering to do this, and keep praising her vag, until she mellows out. And if she never does, hey, maybe she’s just not into oral sex!

2. She wants to fool around in public: Let me be clear: Having full-on sex in public might be a little too risqué — not to mention messy — for some women, myself included. But that doesn’t mean a lady wouldn’t love a heavy-duty make-out session at that banquet in the far corner of the bar, the backseat of her car, or on her front steps!

How to ask: Download the Kelis song “In Public” — the chorus goes “Let’s get it on in public” — and when it plays, ask your girl if she thinks it’s sexy.

3. She wants to be dominated: Even big-mouthed ballsy women like me enjoy being dominated! Yet dominating a woman scares a lot of men because they are afraid — rightfully so — of being rape-y. But with tons of trust and communication, she’ll be creaming her panties in no time! You just need to take baby steps and constantly read her body language to make sure she’s comfortable, both physically and emotionally. I want to emphasize the importance of baby steps: If you’re going to play around with domination, it’s never a good idea to start off with anything that might hurt her feelings or humiliate her, i.e., barking orders at her (“Go down on me NOW!”) or name-calling (“Slut!”). Playing around with restraints — loose restraints, of course — is definitely a better way to go.

How to ask: Start simple. Really simple. “Would you like it if I blindfolded you the next time I go down on you?” If she likes that, next time ask, “Would you like it if I loosely tied your wrists to the bedposts?” If she likes that, next time ask, “Would you like it if I held down your arms while I lick your breasts?” If she likes that, the two of you can figure out what else she might like. It’s also a good idea to create a “safe word,” which is something she can say when she wants you to stop immediately. (Sometimes in the heat of the moment people say “Oh, noooo!” when they really mean “Oh, that feels good!” So it’s good if your safe word is something other than “no.”) My safe word is this sentence: “I want you to stop now.” Because it makes my intentions clear.

4. She wants you to be the submissive one: Getting dominated might not be her thing, but she might want to dominate you. Yes, even if she’s the meek and shy one! Speaking from a lady’s point of view, it can be awkward to tell a guy you want to dominate him because it’s hard to ascertain which guys will think it’s too emasculating. (I am not saying a man getting dominated has to be emasculating; some guys just perceive it that way.) But if you think your woman might get her rocks off by playing the sex goddess, you getting dominated is worth bringing up.

How to ask: Does your lady ever ride cowgirl? If that’s your favorite move — and in my experience, for a lot of guys, it is — tell her that you just LOVE her in control. Then suggest the same things that I recommended under the “She wants to be dominated” section — say you want her to give you a BJ while you’re blindfolded, then with your wrists tied to the bed post, etc. If she finds her inner domination queen, you’re a lucky guy!

5. She wants to be spanked: Lightly spanking a woman (i.e., nothing that could cause a bruise) can feel amazing for both of you: I’ve heard lots of women say that getting spanked sends lots of tingly feelings to their vaginal and anal areas and I’ve heard lots of men say spanking a woman makes them feel like they are physically demonstrating their lust. I’ve been pretty open about my own enjoyment with getting spanked and, I promise you, lots of women really like it. Unfortunately, asking to be spanked can be embarrassing for a woman because, well, it is sort of silly!

How to ask: Just like when you’re asking a woman if she wants to be dominated, the key is to take baby steps. While you’re making out, touch her ass a lot; squeeze it, rub it; show her you think her booty is a-maz-ing. Whisper in her ear, “Can I give you a little spank?” If she says yes, do it once, softly. Ask, “Do you like that?” If she says yes or even if she’s ambivalent, ask if you can do it a few more times, all the while kissing her and still squeezing and rubbing her ass. Then you should probably stop. Next time you guys are cuddling, bring up how you liked giving her little spanks and ask if she wants to try it again sometime. If she’s receptive, ask her if she wants you to do it harder or if she’d like to lie in your lap while you spank her. One more thing: my advice about dominating a woman is the same here, too. Do not call her names or humiliate her unless she tells you that’s what she wants. For all you know, she has issues left over from childhood about being physically punished and calling her a “bad girl” might be upsetting. The same goes for women who might have had abusive relationships in the past: Even if your woman really likes getting spanked, it’s important to remember that spanking is still hitting and you need to make it 100 percent absolutely clear that you’re only doing it in the context of sexual arousal. Understood? Now go get it on.

5 Reasons to Know Why Women Commit to Older Men --- Many women love to date older men and the craze to date a married/divorced old man is a dream or fantasy for them. Why women prefer dating older men? There are several reasons behind loving an old married or divorced man. Take a look.

Older men are matured and won't commit silly mistakes like young boys. This is one of the most common reasons behind women dating an older man. Older men are matured, understands the situation, knows how to handle stress and relationship and most importantly, they are stable.

Many women commit to older men because they feel old men are confident and knows what he wants in life. They are sensitive like a woman desires and the confidence to deal with situations make a woman love an older guy who can support and help find solutions.

This is another common reason behind women who date older men. Older men are experienced both physically and mentally. This is why they have better understanding levels and knows how to tackle a woman. They are experienced in dealing with women, their attitudes and expectations. This is why women love to date older men and wishes to see a future with them!

To enjoy the life with luxury and leisure, women feel older men are well settled in their life and can fulfill all she desires. He will understand what his woman wants or expects from him.

Older men are experienced and can make love in a better way. Woman commit to older men to enjoy lovemaking session to the fullest like men. Unexperienced young guys can't satisfy them this is why women love to date older men who knows how to keep them satisfied and happy. Some girls wants to sex with old men.

Erika Valente, founder and editor of the popular Makeup Bag blog, was named by Women’s Wear Daily as one of the top ten hottest beauty blogs on the internet. Erika does regular beauty product reviews, shares industry tips and trends, and provides gratuitous advice for the beauty obsessed. She is lending her experienced voice to Health News, sharing her thoughts and views on favorite beauty products and services.

It may not be surprising that working women feel more guilt than men do when work intrudes into their home-life. Technology has paved the way for work to make its way into the home after office hours through e-mails, phone calls and text messages, and according to new research from the University of Toronto, women pay a higher toll for these interruptions in the form of psychological distress.

Women are just as proficient as men at managing the responsibilities of both work and home. However, they suffer more twinges of guilt when receiving work-related contact at home. According to Paul Glavin, a doctoral student at the University of Toronto and lead author of the study, “This guilt seems to be at the heart of their distress.” The findings of the study were recently published in the Journal of Health and Social Behavior.

For their study, Glavin and colleagues analyzed data gathered from 1,042 working American adults in the 2005 Work, Stress and Health Survey. Findings showed that women who received frequent contact at home from supervisors, co-workers or clients reported higher levels of psychological distress, whereas men were less affected. The more work-related calls and emails women received after hours, the more guilt and distress they felt.

Upon further analysis, the researchers expected to link the reason for the gender difference to a greater interference of family responsibilities among women, however women were just as adept at balancing their work and family lives as were men. Instead, the difference was observed to be how women felt about being contacted at home. They were far more likely to feel guilty about handling work issues at home than were men, even if there was no interference with their family lives.

Scott Schieman, a co-author of the report and a professor at the University of Toronto, acknowledged, “Levels of distress and levels of guilt are low overall” and that the study findings remained consistent no matter the women’s ages, marital status, parental status or socio-economic level. Schieman also pointed out that even though women have joined men in becoming financial providers, they continue to have different expectations than about the separation of work and home-life. He explained that “These forces may lead some women to question or negatively evaluate their family role performance when they’re trying to navigate work issues at home.”

In their report on the study, the authors wrote, “Our results demonstrate that guilt mediates the impact of work contact on distress for women. To our knowledge, ours is the first study of a broad cross-section of American workers to document the role of guilt in these processes.”

By nature, women are the nurturers and caregivers, and are ruled by emotion. This may offer insight into guilt feelings over work intrusions into home-life. Finding ways to relieve stress and anxiety may help to promote a more positive outlook for dealing with life’s interruptions whether work related or not. Get some exercise, take a little time to relax, and step back to see the big picture in life. In other words, don’t sweat the small stuff, because life is too short.

If you’re looking for the best sexual positions to get pregnant, you probably won’t find any studies definitively proving that one position is better than another. Women can become pregnant in just about any sexual position – and in many cases, without even trying. However, if you want to give yourself an edge, it couldn’t hurt to make a few adjustments that might boost your chances for getting pregnant.

When you are trying to get pregnant, you want your partner’s sperm to get as close as possible to your cervix, and you want the sperm to stay in there for as long as possible to increase the chances that one of those little swimmers will make it all the way to your egg. The main idea is not to force the sperm to swim against gravity – i.e. you don’t want to be standing up or sitting up, because you want to give the sperm the easiest possible opportunity to get where it needs to go.

Missionary position

Probably the easiest way to do this is through the missionary position, with the man lying on top of the woman. This position allows for deep penetration, which will bring the sperm close to the cervix, and it has the added advantage of the woman already lying down so the ejaculate will stay inside your body longer. When you are finished, prop up your hips with a pillow, hug your knees close to your chest, and stay lying on your back for at least 15 minutes.

Other sexual positions 

If the missionary position becomes too boring or routine, you can spice things up with a few variations. For instance, you don’t have to stay on the bed – you can always try things out on a couch, on the floor, or even in the back seat of your car (but make sure you stay clear of onlookers and respect local laws). Another idea is to lie on your back with your pelvis at the very edge of the bed. Your partner can stand in front of you (or kneel if your bed is lower). The advantage is, once you’re finished, you can stay right there on your back for 15 minutes or so to give the sperm an extra chance to get where they need to go.

Another position to try is the rear-entry position, with the man behind you while you are on your knees. This position allows for deep penetration, which is good for getting the sperm close to the cervix, and as an added benefit, many experts call it the best position if a woman has a tipped uterus. After you are finished, simply roll over so that you can lie on your back with your hips elevated.

If you find yourself getting to the point where it seems like you have been “trying too hard,” maybe you need to find a new way to rediscover closeness with your partner. One of the best positions for relaxing is spooning, where your partner curls up against your back and enters from behind. Even though the penetration may not be as deep, this position can be especially relaxing, and many people will tell you that’s a good thing if you’re trying to get pregnant. When you’re finished, you’re once again in a good position to roll over and lie on your back for a few minutes.

Again, there’s no definitive evidence that any one of these positions will be a magic solution, but there’s no harm in trying, and any position that helps the sperm get to where they need to go can’t hurt. But while you’re testing out these positions, remember to follow all of the other preconception recommendations so you can be sure you are maximizing your chances. And above all, don’t forget to have fun and enjoy this special time with your partner.

Having regular sex is the best way to get pregnant. Couples often try to time everything perfectly for ovulation but do not have sex when they think they are not ovulating. It is true that sex that is not within the time of ovulation will not result in pregnancy. However, because women do not always ovulate when they think they will, having sex three times a week will help a woman to cover her bases, so to speak, and not miss an opportunity to get pregnant.

Using an ovulation kit to predict when you are ovulating will improve your chances of getting pregnant. For many women charting or other methods of ovulation prediction are too confusing. Ovulation prediction kits work by reading LH surges prior to ovulation. They are relatively easy to use and are generally accurate for predicting ovulation. Fertility monitors, such as the Clear Blue Easy monitor, are also a worthwhile investment if you would like to get pregnant faster. Fertility monitors are similar to ovulation prediction kits in that they read changes in LH but they also read changes in other hormones and don’t require any guesswork for couples. They are easy to use and will tell you when the best time to get pregnant is.

Sometimes couples get confused about the best time to have sex in relationship to ovulation. You have a small window of time each month to get pregnant. After a woman ovulates the egg will survive approximately 24 hours. Sperm, on the other hand, will live for up to three to five days. This is why having sex two to three days before ovulation will increase your chances of getting pregnant. Don’t wait until the day you ovulate to have sex. Your partner’s sperm will last longer than your egg and you don’t want to miss an opportunity by waiting.

A lot of couples have heard to have sex around day fourteen of your cycle. This is based on the calendar method and assumes that you have a regular 28-day cycle and ovulate mid-cycle. Although this is better than just picking an arbitrary day to have sex, it is not a very accurate way to predict when you ovulate. Many women do not ovulate on day fourteen and knowing precisely when you ovulate will help you time intercourse better. Ovulation prediction kits, looking at previous months bbt charts, or watching for signs of ovulation will help you to determine when you ovulate.

Fertility Charting is great for tracking your cycle but it does have disadvantages. By the time you can see ovulation on a bbt chart, you have already ovulated. It is good to chart so you can track your cycles, see if you ovulate the same time each month, and also so you can look back on your cycle and see if you timed things right. But if this is your first cycle trying to get pregnant or if you are not ovulating at the same time each month, an ovulation prediction kit would be more helpful.

Make sure you are in good health and have had a regular check up from your OBGYN or medical provider. Untreated infections, sexually transmitted diseases, or poor health can affect your chances of getting pregnant. Its good to see a doctor as well as start taking prenatal vitamins prior to trying to conceive.

This may seem like common sense but many women do try to get pregnant while smoking, drinking or using drugs. Smoking, drugs, and alcohol can affect your fertility. It will also affect your unborn child. It is important to stop smoking or using drugs and alcohol before getting pregnant and not wait until you find out you are pregnant.

Sometimes when couples are trying to conceive, sex becomes a job or function of reproduction and is not as enjoyable. Plan a romantic evening or try something different to spice things up. How you are feeling sexually may factor into your chances of getting pregnant. Some researchers believe that having an orgasm during sex increases your chances of getting pregnant. For women, the spasmic movements of orgasm will help pull the sperm into the uterus and for men a better orgasm may increase the man’s sperm count.

The missionary position is a good position to use when trying to get pregnant. Avoid positions where the woman is on top. Gravity will allow sperm to leak out with these positions. Also try placing a pillow under your hips to help tilt your pelvis and keep the sperm in longer. Don’t get up right after sex. Try to relax and allow the sperm to stay in the vagina as long as possible.

Most couples get pregnant within a year of trying. If you have not gotten pregnant within a year consult your doctor for advice.

When President Obama signed the Tobacco Control Act into law on June 22, 2009, he called attention to the importance of smoking cessation in Americans. Smoking results in more than 400,000 deaths annually in the United States from cancer, emphysema and other respiratory illnesses, cardiovascular disease, and spontaneous abortions or miscarriages during pregnancy. In the United States, there is an increased risk for premature birth in the fetus of pregnant women if the mother smokes, as well as growth retardation of the fetus. Over 1,000 infants die annually because the mother smokes. 

Because of this, the U.S. Preventive Services Task Force has been active in evaluating the interventions appropriate to preventing tobacco use and tobacco related diseases in adults and now especially in pregnant women. The results of their recommendations were published in the Annals of Internal Medicine (Volume 150, page 551, 2009). The task force evaluated all prior publications on smoking cessation and has determined what is the standard of care in the United States.

You can discuss each of these recommendations with your physician to make certain that if you or a family member or friend is smoking, you can use the most important components of these recommendations to be certain all possible help is being given.

The task force indicated that the most important support for an individual is counseling. This counseling consists of five steps: 1. The physician should ask you about your use of tobacco, and you should be telling your physician that you smoke. 2. You should receive a clear message from the physician that advises you to quit smoking. 3. You should express a willingness to stop your smoking. 4. The physician and the physician’s office should tell you how they are going to assist you in quitting your smoking addiction. 5. The office should be certain that it arranges a follow-up visit for you to be certain that your smoking is stopped or reduced, and continued support and follow-up visits need to be scheduled.

In addition, if a person is not pregnant, additional smoking interventions in addition to counseling are important and more effective than counseling or using medications alone. Medications include: nicotine patches, nicotine inhalers, nicotine gum, anti-depression medication such as bupropion, and smoking drive reducers such as varenicline. 

However, if a woman is pregnant, use of medications may be questionable. The task force in looking at pregnant women, regardless of age, strongly recommended counseling with a physician, but did not find adequate studies to determine the safety of medications during the course of a pregnancy. Therefore, pregnant women who smoke particularly need more intensive counseling by their physician and more intensive support by their family. The American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology has suggested standards for gynecologists which are available through their website. 

If you are pregnant, smoking cessation is important to reduce risks to your developing infant. Not only should you not smoke, but you should not be exposed to environmental tobacco smoke. Take every step with your obstetrician to reduce smoking.

If you are a smoker of any age and not pregnant, be certain to engage your physician in helping you to stop smoking. Smoking is a danger to American men and women, and to the infants of pregnant women.

Rayne Simpson is the pseudonym of an Open Salon blogger who writes under the handle L in the Southeast. 

Although I was only 40 or 41 when my second divorce became final in 1985, I swore not to remarry. At the time, I believed my life of love and romance was over forever. But eventually, I began to crave the attentions of men.

Before my marriage, I dated all kinds of guys, most of whom turned out to be some form of unavailable. Many were broken like me and afraid of commitment. Others were playboys because they could be. But there was one type of "unavailable" that I found particularly exciting: a married man.

I didn't know he was married at first, because he never said he was, and I never thought to ask. That sounds so naive -- even false -- as I write it now, but it's true. He behaved like a single man. I had his phone number, he was highly attentive, and he initiated dates in the evenings. Imagine my shock and confusion when my father, of all people, after listening to me rave about my new boyfriend, asked what his name was. When I told him, my father responded, "Baby, he's married."

Of course I was hurt. I was also embarrassed -- I mean, my father?! -- and furious. When I confronted the guy, he was quite upfront about the fact that he was married. He just assumed I knew because he was fairly common in our social circles.

By then, we had become a habit to one another. He was drop-dead handsome, a highly successful investment banker, and the best lover I had encountered until that point. He gave me gifts from Tiffany and Hermès. And I began to see the upside to this arrangement: All this, and I didn't have to worry about being pressed for a commitment. 

Perfect, I thought. I'm not breaking a promise to anyone. What he chooses to do is between him and his wife, a woman I'd never met. He's the adulterer; I'm just a fornicator, and I can live with that. Or so I thought.

I hadn't counted on falling in love with the guy. Well, whether it was love or not is debatable; I'm not sure I know what love is even today. But every time a holiday came around and I found myself sitting in my apartment alone with my little son, I felt miserable. I didn't like what I called "coming in last" in his list of priorities. Knowing full well what I had signed up for, I still felt ignored, mistreated and, ultimately, used. 

After the failure of my second marriage a decade or so later, I was absolutely terrified of getting hurt again like I had been by my husband. And I was well aware of the hazards involved with dealing with a married man. My solution? Only date married men! 

That's right: I would get the companionship I craved, but I would be in total control of the relationship and not be surprised by the "less than" feelings I had experienced with that banker. I wouldn't allow them. If anyone would be a user, it would be me. 

In order to be able to face the bathroom mirror each morning without seeing a harlot staring back at me, I made some rules for myself:

1. I would never, ever cheat on someone to whom I was in any way committed -- even my married lover.

2. I would never date any man whose wife I had ever seen or with whom I had spoken.

3. I would never allow myself to "miss" my married lover. That wasn't part of the deal.

4. If he ever started talking about leaving his wife for me, I would end it.

And so I launched into a series of affairs with married men. Some lasted longer than others, but most were exciting and satisfying -- until they weren't, at which point they would end. However, after the last one, which broke off sometime in the late 1990s, I decided I was done with them. Why? Because for all those years I did it, I was kidding myself.

Not knowing these men's wives hardly kept me from thinking about them. When I wasn't feeling guilty about cavorting with their husbands, I was feeling resentful of them for existing. Whether I admitted it or not, I still felt what I was doing was wrong.

Entering the relationships with eyes wide open never completely prevented my feelings of "coming in last." I was still alone on holidays, still attending social functions solo, still existing as somebody's deep, dark secret.

There was something exciting about having a man risk his marriage, his social standing and sometimes his career just to be with me. There was a thrill. We were breaking convention, sneaking around. It was the kind of rush I imagine sky divers or bungee jumpers get hooked on. But after the adrenaline surge faded away, and the loneliness set in, I finally understood it wasn't just those women who were being cheated. I was, too.

Surat Municipal Corporation and IAAA Knowledge Forum will be organising Femicon-2011 here on Saturday. Over 600 college girls between the age group of 17 and 26 will get information on health and sex problems, issues related to marriage, plastic surgery and legal aspects of rights and duties of a woman from known experts in the respective fields.

The meet will be held at Rang Bhavan of Jeevan Bharti School at Nanpura. Well-known Gynaecologists Dr Prafful Doshi, Dr Sandhya Chasathiya and Dr Usha Valadara, plastic and cosmetic surgery experts Dr Hiren Desai and Dr Vitrag Shah and advocate Preeti Joshi will speak on various issues. 

An open forum of women of substance will be conducted by Dr Vikas Desai, Dr Malti Shah and Dr Rupal Shah. A free check-up camp for thyroid and blood for the women will also be conducted. 

Dr Hemant Desai, chief medical officer of SMC, said, "This is an attempt towards empowerment of women. Young women should have good knowledge about their body, health and problems." 

IAAA Knowledge Forum is a group of doctors and service organisations. It has been set up with an intention to make young generation aware about various issues.

Men who abuse women physically and emotionally can also sabotage their partners' control of birth, pressuring them to become pregnant against their will, new reports indicate. 

Several small studies have described this type of coercion among low-income adolescents and young adults with a history of IPV. Now, a report released Tuesday by the federal government funded National Domestic Violence Hotline says 1 in 4 women who agreed to answer questions after calling the hotline, said a member had lobbied to get pregnant, told them do not use contraceptives, or obliged them to have unprotected sex. 

The report is based on responses from more than 3,000 women, but it was not a research study, those involved said. 

"It was very telling," said Lisa James, director of health at the Family Violence Prevention Fund in San Francisco, who worked with the hot line in the report. "There were stories of men who refuse to use condoms, forcing sex without a condom, make holes in condoms, contraceptive pills in the toilet flushing. 

"There were a lot of stories about how to hide the birth control pills - that keeps" losing "their birth control pills, until he realized that he was hiding," added Ms James. 

One respondent described having to hide in the bathroom to take the pill. Another said that when she had her last period, the couple was "furious." 

The report of the phone line did not include a comparison group and did not collect information on participants, who were interviewed anonymously, and was published in a peer-reviewed journal. Was based on answers to four questions posed to 3169 women across the country, which in contact with the line of hot violence between August 16 and September 26, 2010, which were not in immediate danger and who agreed to participate. About 6,800 callers refused to answer questions. 

Of the respondents, about a quarter said yes to one or more of these three questions: "Does your partner or ex has told him not to use birth control?" "Does your partner or former partner ever tried to force or pressure to get pregnant?" "Does your partner or ex ever made to have sex without a condom to get pregnant?" 

One in six said yes to the question "Does your partner or former partner ever removed a condom during sex, to get pregnant?" 

The questions were designed by Dr. Elizabeth Miller, an assistant professor of pediatrics at the School of Medicine, University of California, Davis, whose previous work on reproductive coercion sparked interest in the subject. 

"It is very important to recognize reproductive coercion as a mechanism of control in an unhealthy relationship," said Dr. Miller. At the same time, he added, young women and girls dating older men may be confused by the pressure to become pregnant. 

"If you can put on the skin of a 15 years old, dating from 18 - or the man of 19 years of age who is not an unusual situation, and he says: 'Let's make babies beautiful together, "that is very seductive." 

But Dr. Miller said that more research is needed to understand the motivations of men. 

"One thing that appears a lot is: What are the ideas guys," he said, adding that his own research suggests some answers. 

"Some people have an intense desire for a nuclear family, and many who had experiences of a dysfunctional home family wants something better," he said. Some young men said, "I leave a legacy, and say, 'I'm not sure how long I'll be." youth gangs affiliated with the state that comes with having babies of several women. " 

Dr. Miller's paper, published last year in the journal Contraception, said that in five family planning clinics in northern California, one third of the 683 patients whose partners were physically abusive men said they had also pressed to become pregnant or had sabotaged birth control. Of 191 women who reported birth control sabotage, 79 percent also reported physical abuse, according to the study. 

The associations help explain why young victims of intimate partner violence are at increased risk of unintended pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. 

Ms. James, the Family Violence Prevention Fund, said that despite the new emphasis on reproductive coercion, he doubted that was a new phenomenon. 

"Just do not think enough people have been asking the question," he said.

Women who like to lull themselves to sleep with a drink or two may want to think twice — a new study shows alcohol can disrupt the sleep patterns of women more than those of men.

The study found that after drinking alcohol, women got fewer hours of sleep than men did after drinking. They woke more frequently and for more minutes during the night.

Women who drank alcohol at intoxicating doses got about 20 minutes less sleep than those who drank caffeine-free cola.

"This may not sound a lot," said study researcher Dr. J. Todd Arnedt of the University of Michigan, "but when you think about it, these are healthy, young adults with normal sleeping habits. For someone who sleeps eight hours a day, 20 minutes is equivalent to about 4 percent of total sleep time."

Although alcohol can increase feelings of sleepiness during the early part of the night, it can disrupt the continuity and quality of sleep in the second half of the night, making the person more wakeful. And this so-called "rebound effect" is most pronounced in young healthy women, Arnedt said.

"We're interested in seeing how alcohol affects sleep differently between men and women, because women metabolize alcohol differently," Arnedt said. Women tend to have less body water and more body fat than men. As a result, they tend to have a higher breath-alcohol concentration after drinking equal amounts of alcohol, even after their alcohol consumption is adjusted for body weight.

"However, women also eliminate alcohol faster than men. Women's breath-alcohol concentration declines more quickly as the night goes by," he said.

The researchers gave 93 men and women in their 20s either caffeine-free cola with bourbon or vodka, or a placebo of cola with tonic water. The participants drank enough to push their peak breath-alcohol content to about 0.11 percent — well above the legal limit of intoxication in the United States. The participants then slept for eight hours under observation.

Similar to previous studies, this study found that alcohol could affect sleep continuity. However, unlike previous studies, it showed that there was no gender difference in sleep architecture, the nightly cycle of sleep stages that includes rapid eye movement and nonrapid eye movement sleep.

"It's actually reassuring that the data on sleep architecture conflicted with previous studies," said Dr. Mary Carskadon, a sleep researcher at Brown University who was not involved with this study. "Studies in the past, especially ones with smaller sample sizes, might have over-interpreted the effects of alcohol on sleep architecture."

This, by contrast, was the first large-scale study that directly compared the effects of alcohol in men and women, and it produced solid data for future discussions and references.

"The results may not be as meaningful for healthy adults, since they are not likely to drink heavily, regularly. However, there are some people with insomnia who like to self-medicate by drinking before they go to bed. Well, this research is telling you to not do that. Especially if you're a woman," Carskadon said.

The researchers also compared the findings between those with a family history of alcoholism and those with no family history, and found no difference in sleep disruption between the two groups.

Arnedt agreed that his research is likely to be a starting point for studying other groups, particularly people with insomnia or alcohol-use disorders.

"We can use this to understand which group of people would be most vulnerable to alcohol misuse and understand how sleep might factor in the development of problem drinking," he said.

Men are twice as likely to go out with a friend who has cheated on her with another woman than one who has cheated with another man, according to a new study by a psychologist at the University of Texas at Austin.

Women show the opposite pattern. It is more likely to continue dating a man who has had a heterosexual relationship than one that has had a homosexual relationship.

The study, published last month in the journal Personality and Individual Differences, provides a new understanding of the psychological adaptations behind the desire of men for a variety of partners and the desire of women to a committed partner. These units have played a key role in the evolution of human mating psychology.

"A robust mechanism is triggered jealousy in men and women different types of signals - those that threaten parenthood in men and those who threaten the abandonment of women," says Jaime C. Conference, the study's lead author and doctoral student in developmental psychology.

Conference conducted the study with his father, Mark D. Cloud, a psychology professor at Lock Haven University in Pennsylvania.

The researchers asked 700 college students to imagine they were in a committed romantic and sexual relationship with someone who has been dating for three months. They were asked how they would respond to infidelity committed by the couple expected.

Some participants said that their partners had been unfaithful with a man, others with a woman. Some said that their partner had an affair with a person, other people with multiple partners. Some said that the infidelity happened once, twice.

The findings suggest that men have more difficulty by the type of infidelity that could threaten his paternity of the offspring. Men can also see the couple's homosexual relationship as an opportunity to mate with more than one woman at the same time, satisfy the desire of men older than most members, say the authors.

"These results are even more remarkable considering that homosexuality attitude surveys show men have more negative attitudes toward homosexuality and less favorable to civil rights for same-sex partners than women. However, this general tendency of men to show less tolerance of homosexuality that women invest in a gym situation improves - female homosexuality, "say the authors.

By contrast, women opposed to relations after the two types of things, but especially for a homosexual relationship boyfriend. This matter can be seen as a sign of dissatisfaction with the current relationship and a possible prelude to abandonment, according to the authors.

Participants were also asked the results of the experiences of infidelity in real life. Results similar to scenarios imagined infidelity: Men were significantly more likely than women who have completed their real relations as a result of a couple (presumably heterosexual) affair.